DREAMS ... with pictures
08/03/1010:27 pm
PICTURES ARE NOW UP... MANY THANKS, TAMMY!!!
DREAMS
I suppose we all ought to have them: that is goals or dreams, the problem (at least for me) is that they keep changing. Though I don't often use or quote people who are are lost, unless I'm painting them in a bad light, for this blog I'll make an exception... because the quote is that good. “Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.” --- James Dean (Though I do believe the quote is good, I want to use those words in a way that might not seem so obvious at first blush. I will do this farther on in today's blog.)
I was twenty years old when I walked into a dealership in down-town Charleston, West Virginia and spoke to the owner and told him that the baby-blue Rolls Royce (which was prominently displayed in his showroom) would be mine before I turned 30, at least one just like it: and I further told him that when I purchased it... I would pay cash: then I walked out. I'm sure he and the other salesman had a good laugh over that one. None-the-less, I figured I could do it and in less time than I had told him.
So, I set out trying to make that happen. I went to a seminar on self-made millionaires and I learned the most common way to get rich was through real estate. Because that option required capital on hand I wanted to know how the other two-percent made it: writing or inventing rounded out the rest of that short list. I set my hand to accomplish this and began working toward that goal.
A funny thing happened en-route to my trying to obtain material wealth... I got saved. Now, it might be true for some that what was important to them before salvation remains important to them afterward, but for me that wasn't the case.
When I tell you what I was making around the time I got saved it will not sound like a lot based on today's economy, but in the early '80's (nearly 30 years ago) it was a decent living. (I had started out working as a machinist in Nitro, West Virginia.) In just a few years after I was saved I left that job to go into the ministry... at that time while working at McJunkin I was making $412.00 a week. ($10.30 an hour) Of course, in between my 40+ hours per week at McJunkin I was always working part time jobs at the same time as my full-time work. Example: after my shift at McJunkin I would drive to Vocational Rehabilitation in Institute and work late into the night. In addition to that, during the summers and on weekends I also worked at Rock Lake Pool in South Charleston as a lifeguard. Typically I averaged about 70 hours a week earning money while working for others and on the side I was still doing my work at home and trying my hand at that inventin' and writin' stuff. (At that time I was all-about trying to make money.)
As an aside and this has ABSOLUTELY NOTHING to do with what I am writing about, but... you ought to try and find some old pictures of Rock Lake Pool, it was magnificent. If I remember correctly it was the largest pool in the United States... at two football fields long? (I can't guarantee that but I think that's what Sam told me one time.)
Sam and Dave... not the soul brothers... owned the place and though they were considered by most who knew them as crotchety old men, they were always nice to me. Sam interviewed me personally. He only had one request before he agreed to hire me. At the time I was young and I used to lift often at the gym, and he believed I might be too muscled to be able to dive from the cliffs and over the board-walk below. (Oh for those long ago days when someone might take a look at me and believe I was too muscled. (lol)
The pool had several different lifeguard stands and there were always five of us on duty at a time and we would change stands every hour. One of the stands was along a rock ledge above the board-walk and behind the slide: Sam wanted to be sure I could clear the board-walk below in case I ever saw anyone in trouble from that end of the pool.
I swam across the pool and began finding hand-holds in the cliff face and I started up. At only about 15 feet off the water I lost my hold and fell backward into the water. “Great,” I thought, “there goes this job.” (I knew that he would be watching from the far side of the pool.) Somewhat broken... but certainly not ready to quit trying, I started up the second time and I continued climbing until I was about 20 feet above the board-walk, which was about 30 feet above the water... I turned, took a deep breath, and leaped out for all I was worth. Like Sam, I wasn't sure that I could do it either?
Sam had told me after I dove into the pool to go and see the head lifeguard. (It has been so many years that I can no longer remember his name for sure... maybe, Ron? But if anyone swam there regularly during that time (I think my last year was '78 or '79) they would probably have known him: he was a nice guy and the head lifeguard when I worked there.) I swam to his lifeguard stand and climbed out.
He said, “You're hired, you dive out really good... for a big guy.” Imagine that. All during the '70's... tops I was only 195 pounds... and I was called a “big guy?” Hard to believe isn't it?
(Sorry about continuing this but when I thought of the pool I had such a rush of memories.) After that first time diving from the cliff-face (as a test only to be sure that in case of an emergency I could do it) Sam had told me that insurance was high and he didn't want any of his lifeguards to do that on a regular basis. Naturally, that made us want to do it... and often.
Every weekend they hired a local station and they would come out and play rock music and do live television broadcasts from the pool. At that time it was nothing to have 1,200 to 1,500 people swimming, playing, and dancing at the same time, it was always a madhouse.
During those weekends Sam would leave for a couple of hours and there were three of us lifeguards (during the break when the pool was cleared) who would climb high up on the rock-face and then we would dive in unison. Of course it helped knowing that the television cameras were on us and it was being broadcast live. Each week we would dare to go higher... I never made it all of the way to the top... more than 70 feet... but we went a long way toward it. Weekly, it almost took my breath away when I first turned after climbing and looked down... then I would steady myself and dive out. But, it was always over in an instant and I never even remembered the dive itself... just the shouts and cheers when we surfaced, it was fun! (Now, I'll tell you something that potentially was not as much fun. During those long breaks all of us lifeguards had to swim under the board-walk and between the pilings for the entire length of the pool. The reason: we were looking for bodies... no kidding. The pool had a very large paddle-wheel that greatly disturbed the water. Tragedies in the past had shown that if anyone had drowned (unseen) the current (which was created by this big wheel) would send the body under the board-walk and it would get trapped there. Fortunately, nothing like this ever happened during the time I worked there. Sadly, a few people had drowned in exactly that manner (and) in times past.)
Though I have swam in countless lakes, streams, rivers, pools, and two different oceans in two different countries … the closest I ever came to drowning was during the time I worked there and while cleaning the bottom of the pool! Early one Saturday morning before the pool opened I was told to wrap a heavy chain around my upper body, slide a leaded pipe over a broom handle, then jump into the deep end of the pool. The idea was that I would breathe through a long rubber hose that was attached to a generator which was setting on the board-walk: then, I was to just walk along the bottom of the pool and sweep everything up which had accumulated there: after doing this the pool's filters would then take care of the floating detritus. I did exactly that... until there was a glitch with the mask and I could no longer get air: add to that the fact that I took them literally... when they said to “wrap” the chain around me: now I couldn't get it off. (Just now the thought of me walking around on the bottom of the pool with a heavy chain securely tied around me while pushing a broom, almost made me laugh-out-loud... but at that time while I was running out of air and struggling to swim to the top with a heavy chain around me... it didn't seem nearly as funny.)
Now, I'll tell you something that if I were the type to embarrass easily, then this would probably do it. However, because I don't... a sardonic smile is all that this next thought is causing me to experience. Every Friday night, as casually as I could mention it and yet still be sure that she understood, I would remind Deb that another (live) television crew would be out at the pool tomorrow... and again I would be diving from high up on the cliff-face.
During all the time I worked there, and the many dives I made which were broadcast, I don't think she ever saw even one? You might ask... “How do I know that for sure?” Because, I would... as nonchalantly as possible, ask her that evening. “Did you and the girls (Tammy and Missy were very young) see any of the programming today?”
“Yeah, I saw some,” she would say.
“Did you get to see when the three of us dove?” Of course, what I was actually asking was... “Did you get to see ME dive?”
Every single time the answer was always the same, “No.”
Now, to be fair, the reasons were usually different: though they were all of the same general theme. The babies needed something, or other... dishes to wash... diapers to change... clothes to iron... (I know, “iron” … keep in mind though this was 30 years ago and clothes actually wrinkled and people even used starch. Can you believe that?)
If I sound bitter... it's only because I am! I mean... repeatedly risking life-and-limb while attempting to show-off and she doesn't even watch... how fair is that? (lol) Now that I'm remembering these things I think that it's a good thing Deb and the girls are out cleaning the church tonight, or I might go and find her and kick her in the leg... or something like that. (Someday I might even write about the time I wrecked one of my motorcycles while trying to show-off in front of another pretty girl I was wanting to date. It seems that many times in my life I have played the fool because of a beautiful girl. I'm not sure who first said what I next quote, but, at least for me, it seems appropriate: “God made woman beautiful and foolish; beautiful, that man might love her; and foolish, that she might love him.”) Now, if I can remember what I was writing about, I'll try and get back to it.
After I was saved I no longer had the desire or drive to have material wealth. Even now, if I were to make a conscience decision and decide that I wanted to make a lot of money... I truly don't believe that I could: regardless the effort I might put into it. The reason is that I believe there is a God in Heaven who hears and answers prayers, and I have prayed Proverbs 30:8 as my own prayer and I have done this many dozens of times in my life. “Remove far from me vanity and lies: give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me:” (GIVE ME NEITHER POVERTY NOR RICHES!)
I have prayed that prayer because of the verse that follows and the many examples I read in the Bible and saw in the world around me of money and materialism becoming a great snare in the lives of people, and this is also true even in the lives of the redeemed.
Proverbs 30:9: “Lest I be full, and deny thee, and say, Who is the LORD? or lest I be poor, and steal, and take the name of my God in vain.” The two verses (together) show the plight of sinful man. If we have too much in the way of material goods there is a great tendency to forget about God and believe we don't need Him. If we have too little, then the tendency is to be dishonest (if necessary) in order to gain what we want. However, if we ask of Him what is only “convenient” for us... that means what is “necessary” and not what is only “wanted,” then we are exactly where He wants us.
Read the two verses together for better understanding. Proverbs 30:8-9: “Remove far from me vanity and lies: give me neither poverty nor riches; feed me with food convenient for me: Lest I be full, and deny thee, and say, Who is the LORD? or lest I be poor, and steal, and take the name of my God in vain.”
Now I want to repeat the quote I began with... “Dream as if you'll live forever, live as if you'll die today.” Upon first reading that, how do you believe most people would respond? … LIVE LIFE TO THE FULLEST... or … MAKE THE MOST OF IT, YOU ONLY GO AROUND ONCE... or … HE WHO DIES WITH THE MOST TOYS WIN... or, any of a hundred other inane sayings that are altogether senseless.
Let me ask you a question. Wouldn't it be just as worthy a goal to see how simply you could live? Isn't the “dream” of trying to simplify your life a loftier goal than trying to live your life in the rather beggarly aim of only trying to obtain... more and more! Also, if your dream was to have a simpler, less encumbered life while on this Earth, then wouldn't you be more prepared for the second part of that quote... “live as if you'll die today.” I mean, I Timothy 6:7: states: “For we brought nothing into this world, and it is certain we can carry nothing out.”
I refuse to believe that I have any less of a dream or a goal in only wanting to live a life free of material things, than does someone whose goal is to amass as much as they can before they die. Preacher used to make fun of people like that. He said they like to, “Get all they can... and can all they get.” (A pretty good saying.)
Admittedly, I'll not get there in this life, I'm not a pessimist, just a realist. The only way I will feel like I have ever arrived at that goal is to be able to live entirely off-the-grid. And this has nothing to do with wanting to live-green, or being a tree-hugger. I'm neither of those things... I'd cut down whatever I needed to build my little house and on save-the-Earth days, maybe I'll top off my tank and leave the cap loose, and I'll run my mower even if the lawn doesn't need cut, and I'll water the kids sandbox just in case something is in there waiting to grow... maybe I'll even waste two or three tanks of gasoline in useless driving and sightseeing, something I don't even like... just as my way of protest against all those green-people!
Every time I mention to Deb about getting rid of everything... literally... and moving out somewhere and living off-grid, her response is always the same: “You can go, but not me.” It sounds easy enough, but that would in no way un-complicate my life, it would only make it harder. I would still have to take care of her and the house she lives in AND my little place in the woods. (So, for now I can only take baby-steps... a little at a time.)
Before moving to this house we had almost all of our belongings in storage for nearly a year. When we were getting a truck to move everything I said why don't we get rid of everything that we have lived without for the last year? And we did, we got rid of many things through gifts, yard sales, and the Salvation Army: I mean a lot of things! Alas, we still have too much. (I guess I didn't realize how much until I asked Tammy to come over last night and take some pictures so I could post them for this blog. The pictures helped me to see that I still have a long way to go.)
However, I've told Deb that if she ever changes her mind and decides to do it: live off-grid, then we'll see what stuff the girls want first, then for everything else we'll just call a couple of churches to come and get whatever they want. Now, in the past when people have come to our door from churches trying to collect things for the poor, they usually have said something like this: “We are out collecting items for the poor, and we will take whatever you have, we'll even take your old and worn clothing. All of your unwanted things will be used for the poor and starving among us.”
(Now, to be fair, I always want to be nice to people like this: however, If at sometime in the future we are able to move and get rid of everything, and another church-lady who is collecting shows up on our front stoop... I feel like I should at least try and make the following point.)
“Look lady, the clothes that I wear, the reason I have them is that they are already old, and they were mostly worn-out by someone else before I ever got them: besides, if they can wear my clothes, trust me... they might be poor,,, but they're not starving!”
I will finish this blog with words from a friend of mine. They are in the process of simplifying their lives. To that lofty goal they have decided on a slogan for their new home. “Live simply so that others may simply live.” And before anyone writes to me expressing concern over the possibility that Mahatma Gandhi might have been the author of that quote, so what? I don't endorse James Dean, but what he said was still a remarkable quote. Remember... “even a blind squirrel finds an acorn now and again.” So, Gandhi or Dean... doesn't matter... truth is truth... regardless the author!
Virgil, standing guard in front of our house!
Virgil, relaxing and enjoying a bit of television.
Virgil with bib and ready for lunch.
Virgil, ready for nap after heavy lunch.
Virgil, relaxing in the grand-children's playroom.
Virgil, patiently waiting for me to read to him.
Virgil, in his usual spot as I am typing on the computer.
Virgil, with his main-squeeze, Stella.
You can always email me at clarkmatthews1@aol.com
PS I almost posted without any further explanation. Because people already believe me to be crazy about dogs, and Virgil in particular: I couldn't resist... I had to pose him with bib, hats etc. I repeatedly tried to get him to sit at the table, and on a chair for the picture with the bib; however, he kept hopping down before Tammy could snap the picture. In reality, he is a big baby, and things easily frighten him... but I still love him!
posted by Robin Johnson @ 9:47 PM
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